A Danish activist has launched an online crowdfunding campaign to “buy” California from the United States, presenting the initiative as Denmark’s next great adventure. The campaign, started by Xavier Dutoy, follows recent remarks by U.S. President Donald Trump regarding his interest in acquiring Greenland, with the activist now proposing that Denmark should counter by acquiring California.
A Bold Proposal: Making ‘New Denmark’ a Reality
The campaign, titled “Let’s Buy California from Trump – Denmark’s Next Big Adventure,” argues that California would offer Denmark everything it currently lacks: more sunshine, palm trees, and a thriving tech industry.
“Have you ever looked at a map and thought, ‘You know what Denmark needs? More sunshine, palm trees, and roller skates?’” the campaign’s website asks. “Well, we have a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to make that dream a reality.”
The initiative has gained significant traction, with nearly 200,000 people already signing up in support.
Why California? The Perks of ‘Danifying’ the Golden State
The campaign outlines several reasons why acquiring California would be a strategic move for Denmark:
- Sunshine Galore: Denmark’s climate is known for its long winters and frequent rain. California, by contrast, enjoys 300 days of sunshine a year, making it a perfect destination for sun-deprived Danes.
- Tech Dominance: California is home to Silicon Valley, which could boost Denmark’s technological influence and innovation.
- Avocado Toast Forever: The state grows 90% of the U.S.’s avocados, ensuring a steady supply of this prized ingredient for Danish brunches.
- Protecting the Free World: The campaign claims that Denmark already has “the best freedom,” but adding California would make it even better.
- Disneyland Reinvented: The famous theme park would be renamed Hans Christian Andersenland, featuring Mickey Mouse in a Viking helmet.
Additionally, the campaign humorously proposes changing California’s flag by replacing the bear with a mermaid, arguing that bears are “scary” while mermaids are “fine.”
Why Would Trump Sell?
The campaign suggests that Trump, who has often criticised California’s political leadership, might be open to selling the state.
“Let’s be honest – Trump isn’t exactly California’s biggest fan. He’s called it ‘the most ruined state in the Union’ and has feuded with its leaders for years. We’re pretty sure he’d be willing to part with it for the right price,” the campaign states.
As an added incentive, Denmark would offer Trump a lifetime supply of Danish pastries.
“As for the will of the citizens? Well, let’s face it – when has that ever stopped him?” the campaign quips.
The Plan: Crowdfunding $1 Trillion for the Purchase
The initiative aims to raise $1 trillion—roughly 200,000 kroner from each Dane—to finance the purchase. The campaign’s organisers have outlined a detailed negotiation strategy, which includes:
- Sending LEGO executives to negotiate, based on their experience in handling frustrated children.
- Enlisting the cast of Borgen, Denmark’s famed political drama, to provide additional diplomatic support.
- Introducing Danish values, such as hygge, universal healthcare, and bike lanes to California.
- Renaming Los Angeles to Løs Ångeles, to better reflect its new Danish identity.
Perks for Donors: From Avocados to Private Beaches
Supporters of the campaign can receive various rewards, depending on their level of contribution:
- 10 DKK – A personalised thank-you note from the Danish royal family (or at least a postcard).
- 100 DKK – A virtual tour of the newly renamed “Danishwood” studios.
- 1,000 DKK – A lifetime supply of California-grown avocados (shipping costs not included).
- 10,000 DKK – A street named after them in “New Denmark.”
- 1,000,000 DKK – A private beach in Malibu (terms and conditions apply).
Imaginary Endorsements and Public Reactions
The campaign has also attracted fictional endorsements from various notable figures:
- Viggo Mortensen (Actor, Lord of the Rings): “I may have been born in New York, but my heart is Danish. Let’s bring a little Middle-earth magic to California and make it New Denmark!”
- Lars Ulrich (Metallica Drummer): “I left Denmark for California to chase the rock ‘n’ roll dream. But now, we can bring California to Denmark.”
- Sven the Viking: “My ancestors sailed the seas in search of new lands. Now, we can conquer California without lifting a sword – just our wallets.”
- Karen from Accounting: “I’ve crunched the numbers, and buying California makes perfect sense. Have you seen the price of avocado toast in Copenhagen?”
- Bjørn A. Nonymous (Philosopher): “Hygge is not just a feeling; it’s a way of life. And what could be more hyggelig than sipping cocoa on a California beach?”
Even the fictional Hans Christian Andersen is quoted: “Once upon a time, there was a little mermaid who dreamed of sunny shores and palm trees. Now, Denmark can make that dream come true.”
A Response to Trump’s Greenland Plans
The campaign is widely seen as a satirical response to Trump’s continued interest in acquiring Greenland. The U.S. president has previously floated the idea of purchasing the Danish territory, recently stating that the U.S. might even consider military action to secure control over the island.
U.S. Secretary of State Marco Rubio has insisted that Trump’s intentions regarding Greenland are serious, while Danish Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen has firmly rejected any notion of a sale, declaring that “Greenland is not for sale.”
The crowdfunding initiative thus serves as a humorous counterpoint, highlighting Denmark’s frustration with Trump’s foreign policy manoeuvres.
Will It Work?
While the campaign is clearly intended as satire, it has struck a chord with thousands of people who have signed up in support. Whether or not the initiative prompts any official response remains to be seen.
For now, the campaign’s organisers remain optimistic, urging Denmark to seize the opportunity.
“From hygge to Hollywood – let’s make California Danish!” the website proclaims.
As the campaign nears its next milestone of 200,000 supporters, the world watches with amusement to see whether Denmark’s “next big adventure” will continue to gain momentum.
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